This weekend was my very first Mother's Day. I used to hate Mother's Day. Don't get me wrong, I have a WONDERFUL mother and loved celebrating her and all the things she did for my brother and I, but as far as me personally; I hated Mother's Day. As a woman in my late 20's and early 30's who did not have a child I always felt like people were thinking "What's wrong with her? Why doesn't she have kids?" Those feelings intensified after someone literally asked my mother what was wrong with me and why didn't I have any kids. (Yes, that actually happened, and at church no less) So each year I would go to church and sit through the service while they gave flowers to every other woman in the room and looked at me with those "you'll understand when you have kids" eyes. Stupid eyes.
As you can probably guess, I had become bitter. I looked forward to the day when I would become a mother but I wasn't getting any younger. I don't know the pain of infertility but I can imagine some women who struggle with it must hate Mother's Day far worse than I did. Even as I hold my beautiful baby girl on my very first Mother's Day I have a love/hate relationship with the day. I love that it celebrates mommies and the love they have for their children but I hate how it only focuses on the mommies who can hold their babies. There are a lot of women out there who already feel like mommies, they long to hold their babies, they just don't know how their children will come into their life. Will God allow them to grow their children in their tummy or will they be sent their children through "first mothers" (got that term from reading more adoption blogs than I can count)? I used to wonder the same thing and my dear friends daughter must have noticed because she called me a mommy who didn't have any babies. I thought that was a great compliment.
Well now I'm officially a mommy with a beautiful baby girl and I had a fantastic First Mother's Day Weekend! On Saturday I went to visit my mom and she seemed to be doing better. When I looked in her eyes I saw my mom and not a stranger, it was a wonderful blessing and I am so thankful that God gave me that gift.
The rest of our weekend went like this.....
Ella's "big brother" Dean came to see her
Later that day we left Ella with our friends the Willrich's and went on our first post baby date
We had a great time and although we missed our girl we look forward to many more date nights!!
On Sunday we relaxed and had a great day at home with our sweet baby girl. I got flowers from Scott, Ella, Fanny, George, Cecil & Polly
and from my amazing in-laws
I held her a little longer and stole a few more kisses than usual and it was awesome. We took a family picture but as usually Fanny refuses to look at the camera.
In other news; Ella had her first rescue who was VERY sick and went to DFW pug rescue (you can click on the link to donate or adopt).
She also met a baby horse who was born 2 weeks before she was.
We had a horrible evening with reflux one night but since I made some diet changes she seems to be doing better but that night broke our hearts.
That's what the Courter's have been up to! We are looking forward to getting the professional pictures back, Ella's first trip to visit Poppa D & Dan Dan at Falconhead and a visit from Grammy and PaPa Courter, Uncle Adam, Aunt Jill and cousins Pierson & Kendal. So lots more pictures are coming! We are NOT looking forward to me going back to work.
Until next time!
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